After reading one of my Chinese students, big do, I did not want to; primary school, the parents gave me the goal is to test middle school, junior high school admitted to do, I have not thought about; junior high school, the parents gave me the goal is to test high school test what to do in high school, I never thought of; high school, the parents gave me the goal is to test into college, go to college to do, I have not thought about; at university, parents gave me the goal is to go abroad, abroad what to do, I have not thought about; now studying to get a degree, find work, what do I do next? This time, I want to Think it over.
Thank you for the third letter It woke me up for 25 years buried the enterprise, it changed my passive way of life 25 years. From now on, I should take the initiative for themselves to live! Students come to understand his see every day: can also get from their parents and teachers to help, it is very easy to develop the habit of passive. So many young Chinese are not good at planning their growth initiative route, do not know how to actively seek out resources to step their academic and life higher on the ladder.
the other hand, Chinese parents and teachers accustomed to pre-empt the way to help children design life planning, which often makes a lot of people lose sight of their real character and interest, when these children grow Congress, most of them will find their long lost in the such behavior, these ideas should influence the young generation after generation, that many young people feel, thorns. Although I have mentioned in the first four letters of the importance of the initiative, I decided to write a special letter on pro-active.
talent to become international, in order to play its part in the information age full potential, every enterprising young Chinese should make efforts to force themselves from passive to active, we must become masters of their own future, we must actively manage their academic and future career mm no more than you care about your work and life, no one is more suitable than you manage your own life and career, and only pro-active you can find the real is active?
passive aggressive people who
themselves and the environment affected by the environment around their own right to choose what led
people and things or move things that everyone can dominate the progress
for help when problems
environment of independent thinking bad complaining from the often aggressive
say only you can tell me how to do it.
I must submit to the arrangements for the environment.
who can Tell me what to choose professional?
how no one noticed me?
I always do not have time to do something.
only you can tell me how to do it.
my parents have diabetes I will certainly be. all by myself, I can do better.
I have the right to choose.
I want to develop a plan to select the most suitable for my profession.
I'm going to learn how to arouse people's attention.
What should I give up something important to do the most important thing?
only I have the right and responsibility to decide how I do.
Although parents have diabetes , but as long as attention to exercise, diet, can reduce the risk of disease.
passive (Reactive) by people who always think they are about the environment and others, if others do not pointing, the environment does not change, their is only negative to live. encounter a problem, people always find passive people helped decide the environment is not good, they will blame on others. They are always waiting for fate or elegant aid. For one thing, they always think that things are looking on them, they can not dominate or to promote the progress of things.
active (Pro-active) who believe that in any case, we always have the right to choose. Therefore, they total their there is a sense of responsibility, because the fate of the control in their own hands, and he was not a vassal of the environment or others. For one thing, they always believe that things happen they can lead the development.
why active ?
Thirty years ago, in the industrial society, each employee is a corporate machine in gear. Although the machine needs to gear, but gear is replaceable. The best gear is durable, not excellent.
so these companies are like most people:
a professional knowledge, who can work hard.
passage of time, in today's rapidly changing era, people have taken place in the definition of talent is big change, because in the modern enterprise, there are more people to enjoy of decision-making, more people must be innovative in thinking, but also more people have enough space to decide what to do, how Most people do the work of hh mechanical repetition is no longer a labor, but rather independently and the complexity of decision-making process. renowned management expert Peter? Drucker (Peter Druker) has pointed out: scientists would say the most important thing in this century, not the technology or network innovation, but a major change in the human condition. In this century, people will have more choice, they must actively manage their own. Today, most of the good business people's expectations are:
active, enthusiastic, flexible self-confidence.
in the modern enterprise in order to be successful, we need to develop their own sense of initiative: at work to take responsibility, take the initiative to set goals for themselves, and continue to improve the ways and means; addition, it should develop the ability to promote their own, or colleagues in the leadership before the performance to be good at your strengths,
as a contemporary China's young generation, you should not just passively wait for others to tell you what to do, but should take the initiative to know what to do, and planning them, and then go all out to complete. Think of the most successful in the world today those who have a few that have stuck to passive people? take their studies and research projects, you need to be a mother to the child of a sense of responsibility fully engaged, and continuous efforts. As long as there a proactive approach, there is no goal is not reached.
In fact, many young people are not without a proactive approach to make their own decisions on major issues but not used to make their own decisions. If I asked a Chinese university students: need a decision made by yourself. For example, like reading what professional, read what the school, PubMed, or the decision to go abroad and so, we might be accustomed to listening to their parents, arrangement, or reference to the majority of students choose mm everyone knows, the most important of these issues, only you can help your decision move towards true success. make their own decisions does not matter, but have a significant impact on the decision of his life actually can others. This is how illogical it! In addition, even if you made the decision, it would not you have spent enough advance time to investigate and research. reckless or hasty decision could make you regret it for life!
When Google's founders Sergey - Boolean (Sergey Brin) and Larry - Page (Larry Page) on TV is accessed, the reporter asked what their success can be attributed to the school, they did not answer at Stanford University or the University of Michigan, and the answer is primary school encouraged to try to actively autonomy, self-driving habits, which bring with them their success.
Therefore, every young person should have a positive and active mind, you must be good at planning and managing their own careers, for their own the most important life choices to make. No one cares more about you than your own business, nothing like the same proactive manner to better reflect your own independent personality.
As the American poet Walt Whitman Set active state, I suggest that you follow the seven steps shown in the figure, gradually adjust their mentality, develop their own habits, learning to grasp the opportunity to create opportunities approach and actively show their success and the process of harvesting Happy.
Step one: be positive, optimistic outlook on life
psychologists had found that: a person is defeated, not because of obstacles to the external environment, but on how his reaction to the environment. China Men's soccer team former coach Milutinovic said Statistics generated each day at around 50,000 thoughts. If you have a positive attitude, you will be able to optimistic, creative ideas to put 50,000 into positive energy and power; if your attitude is negative, you will be very pessimistic, weakness, lack of security, but also put the idea into a 50,000 negative obstacles and resistance.
negative people to allow or expect to control their own environment, like all listen to other people arrangements, but in this case, he can not have the ability to control their own destiny and can not have avoided defeat; the contrary, positive person always indomitable spirit of perseverance to face the difficulties, his success is expected. positive people always use the most optimistic and the most glorious experience of the spirit of domination, control your life; negative person is exactly the opposite of life is always in their various failures and confusion over the shadow.
With a positive attitude, and can not guarantee every success. positive attitude will certainly change a person's lifestyle, but does not guarantee that everything his all wishes come true; However, negative attitudes persist but will be lost, I have never seen a negative attitude held by people who can achieve sustainable, true success.
course, not everything must be selected by themselves, not everything can come by their own led. So, the choice of a positive attitude, we must maintain peace of mind, that is, I always say the sentence:
the courage to change things can change, there are things that can not be changed mind to accept the wisdom to know the difference.
Step Two: Keep away from the habit of passive, from the little things
passive habit is the biggest obstacle to active, if you grew up in the negative, passive environment, grow up, you more should have its own efforts to eliminate those negative factors.
example, people are always passive fatalism, superstition, to have things go wrong to blame genetics, Constellation, blood type and other factors, and thus become self-pity, is not always blame others, accused of poor environmental mm If this idea become a habit, he will be caught in the vicious cycle of passive, unable to extricate himself.
how far from a passive young man? I would like to make five a suggestion:
one, do not blindly listen to hide, should be calm and discrimination, positive confirmation
Now, rumors circulating the Internet regularly. If you blindly believe these rumors, you will be around some people with ulterior motives. For example, some students sent a letter and said: ; of things there will always be something hidden trap. and as long as a positive confirmation to the search engines, can immediately Bianqi authenticity.
In addition, many students do not know how to take the initiative to search and verify information, methods or importance. There is not few students asked me to help him find information on a certain university, and even there I asked the students to a word's meaning and usage mm Indeed, this information simply search on the Internet, you can find the answer. Therefore, when Every time I found the answer, always told the students, said:
should go online to verify their own initiative. change, rather than doing nothing because you only become a reality.
had a classmate who told me: They are all fighting for the job. I had to choose to wait, if that company does not employ me, I went to another company to go. a job, why are you so passive, and not only know to wait to take the initiative to do? Guo Beijing, a small and young and lively girl. see her at first sight you may be surprised to know that Microsoft is one of the most senior Chinese managers. but if you talk to her for a minute, you is not surprised. She speaks Every word reveals the self-confidence and a positive and optimistic leadership, and rigorous logic and strategic thinking. She told me a story she was active:
six months after the United States must participate in SAT. when I have not bad English, but grammar, vocabulary, composition are not. although my math SAT was 780 points (almost perfect score of 800 points), but the test in English only 280 points. If done nothing has 200 points, 280 points you can imagine how terrible! But I still hope to apply for the University of California, Department of Electrical Engineering. , my application may not be read to be directly rejected. But I admit defeat, I am sure if I was accepted, I will be a successful engineer. So, I decided to appeal l r. , I emphasized the spirit of learning ability and hard work. Finally, I said: l President President, if you admit me, I promise I will be your school's property. r interviewed me. I interviewed her, she see my English is already making rapid progress. I told her personally guarantee that my English and American students will learn as well. A week later, the University of California to rescind the order, decision accepted me. students have a strong ; but never ask themselves: For example, to decide what food in the restaurant, decide their own dress, to decide where to go on weekends to play, and so on. You should learn on their own to make reasonable arrangements of life, rather than How to. their own ideas. so that But you want to eat, then, do not influence decisions of others your own expression of opinion. Are there any people always like to tell you what to do? If so, determined to ask them not to do so. If they do not Listen, then do with them.
In other words, we try to get their own subconscious, celebrity hh promised myself, when you think to say into the habit of initiative.
Fourth, do not say ? can not break off the problem, step by step to solve? or whether you need to improve their ability in a certain area and then head back to deal with this problem? Do not escape, said he had no choice or no time no one mm lack of time, but, the way each person has a different time.
five, the use of language subconsciously train yourself
in Steven b Covey's : Our language will subconsciously guide our thoughts, will truly reflect a person's attitude to the environment.
accustomed to passive people, the words of blame will be personality showing.
, for example, angry when they complained: . pressure, I had to choose to obey.
when their self-confession, said: Active people are always given in the words of the right to decide, they like to say include: emotion. complain.
Step three: to themselves, seize their own destiny
One student asked me: had a great discussion. Some students believe that the world fair, a man aspiring to be able to overcome all obstacles; also some students that the world-class end unfair, because whether it is wealth, talent or luck, God always seems to favor others.
this, my answer is: Everything depends on the fate (fatalistic) and everything on their own (humans over nature) are not appropriate.
everyone has chosen to have the opportunity, however, congenital and environmental factors, how many different opportunities for each person. So, this world is not entirely fair. But because the world is not fair if you give up her own opportunities and choices, that is your own responsibility to blame the world is not fair.
give an analogy. Some people born with because of genetic reasons, may be at some point suffer from more serious disease. But this does not mean that he will be sick. if he can seize the opportunity to do the right choose to arrange their own exercise and diet, his health is likely more than anyone else; but if he is not good for r l gene to give up on themselves, then the chance of his illness will almost certainly multiply.
So, all things have to think clearly, they can not change what is to be accepted and what is their own choice, what is your challenge to be brave. When you meet when you can not change things, to be brave to accept it, do not waste your time In remorse, envy and jealousy on. you should do is take the initiative to seize the destiny you can choose, can change, you can maximize your influence part.
Also, even in the most difficult time When you feel fate has cast you away, you always have a choice. As Frank said: free. own behavior attributed to environmental or others. they treat people, there will always according to their own principles or values, made a conscious and responsible choice, rather than completely succumbed to the pressure of the external environment.
person responsible for their own face up to life. we do not take the uncertain or difficult thing blindly on the shelf. For example, some students think of English as important, but school is not the exam, learning English is not their own; or, some students feel that they need to participate in community communication skills training, but because of shyness is not an active registration. In this regard, we must recognize that a solution is not resolved, no decision is a decision, negative solutions and decision opportunities will be lost in front of you, You will one day pay a heavy price.
some students asked me: You can not actively seek you want most, at least you should actively avoid the most unwanted. If you want a proactive, responsible for their own people, I suggest you act now, according to the following strict demands on themselves:
to a full day, listen to themselves and people around the language, pay attention to whether there is based on past experience, imagine yourself in the near future will face a number of daunting to escape the situation? this situation in your own sphere of influence within it? how you should be in line with the principle of pro-active response? please simulated one by one mind.
from work or daily life, to find a way to make sense of frustration you prepared to do. think about which category it belongs to, it can directly control things, or things that can indirectly control , or simply can not control things? and then in their own sphere of influence and put into action to find a solution.
exercise their own sense of initiative. In the next 30 days, to focus on things within the scope of his influence on his promise commitments, and to be fulfilled; to do a lit candle to others, not judge right or wrong of the judge; lead by example, do not just criticize; solve problems, not create problems; do not blame others or for their own whitewash, not blaming Heaven, no particular people; do not live in their parents, colleagues, or under the shadow of society, make good use of talented independent will, and happiness is responsible for their actions. trial thirty days a pro-active training method, look, its own sphere of influence after the training whether the change?
Step Four: active attempt
encounter opportunities and student exchanges in, I found that some students by a number of setbacks since lost the courage to struggle. For example, some students because the exam-oriented education continues at the university and regret go to university, some students because it does not, wasted professional time, as well as graduate students because of academic problems during the encounter frustrated hh do not know if you have not thought about, these are to face frustration, they need you to have a proactive attitude. everywhere in life is an opportunity, a lot of opportunities to hide among one another setback, front setback discouraged if you are, you are likely to pass with his opportunities .
actively trying to learn the best way. in an advanced company, you do not need to worry about failure. In a survey, CEO of the United States found that they appreciate most are those who volunteered to do a the new jobs. whether or not to do, at least these employees work more than passive acceptance of those employees would be much appreciated, because they have the courage, ambitious, and will learn.
the road for those who are choosing young people, they should actively try different things. In the United States, parents often say is: their own time, trying to do different things, to find the avenue to success. Only then can we encounter in life on the road to more opportunities.
my old habits of active start. remember that old , I think the kindergarten curriculum is too easy, so to take the initiative with their parents, said: more knowledge, I boldly asked: , then you should let me read to elementary school. result announcement, of success. This is for my self-confidence and a positive future and laid a solid foundation.
Another example comes from my young friend Guo to illness. His school life is: every door doors of opportunity has a gatekeeper. harvest opportunities paid off, is actively dedicated to find the gatekeeper. When in 1999 he graduated from the China University of Technology, the leading American universities are a lot of notice of acceptance, but all is not scholarship. So he began to write to the professors of these universities, I hope they will accept me as a research assistant to support. month, he wrote two hundred letters, although there are many professors are interested in, but all because of his lack of experience rejected. He also tried to write to the overseas USTC alumni, want recommendations, and no results. One night, pull the face of computer refused to mail a letter sealed, and he a man has lost in the darkness of the laboratory cry. But wake up the next day, he decided to hit the fan the opportunity to continue to the door. A few days later, he received a University of Illinois professor replied, pleased to be funding. The professor said that when he went to system Guo went to illness in the material obtained from the time that the department is preparing to send rejection letter to Guo. Guo to illness finally said: . However, this does not mean down the drain in vain, for a time, this was my chance to knock on the door. step by step, I was able to Microsoft headquarters, to read at Stanford University MBA, Mckinsey to the Amazon and Google to work opportunities.
Americans like to try different work, and they want to change four times the average lifetime of work. In the long-term plan under the influence of economic ideas, more Chinese people are reluctant to change jobs, and more inclined to do one thing for life . In fact, the significance of changing jobs is that you decided to start doing is not necessarily the decision of your life, you still have a chance to try more things, the only way to truly find their own interest, in order to maximize their potential.
so, not because of the temporary do not understand their own strengths and hesitation, take positive action now! you will find their talents and gifts. We have to cherish each attempt, because the opportunities are often not replicated. To stand ready, so as not to miss the opportunity comes, but also should learn from every opportunity to learn the lessons lost. In addition, only the courage to challenge themselves, you can fully develop their potential. I suggest that you regularly to set up their own Some very challenging, but not an unattainable goal.
Step Five: fully prepared, do not wait for opportunities to seize the opportunities
door, because that is a negative approach. Turgenev, said: There are two ways, one is to do nothing waited in vain, the other is the other side, while things move forward. , try your best.
suffering or frustration if it is blocked, we should learn to frustration into motivation, and not the plight of an encounter in a dark corner to hide the blame on others, but do not hesitate to require immediate action when . Life can not be spent in this negative way. We will one day have to face themselves responsible for their own lives. Therefore, we must prepare in peacetime, have sufficient information to make necessary The best choice, seize fleeting opportunities.
Once the opportunity comes, we must go all out to seize the opportunity.
my doctorate, through their own efforts (and students with the help of Hon ), the speech recognition system, recognition rate from the previous 40% to 80%, the academic for my work gave full affirmation. At the time, some teachers believe that as long as the result of processing have been well written papers, Within a few months I could get a doctoral degree.
However, I know, the first step of success to me is just an opportunity, not an answer, as 80% recognition rate is by no means the final For best results, because the method I use just the tip of the iceberg. And, I have published my research results, each institute will study and use my method, so if I'm relaxed now, no experiment , keep working papers in order to graduate as soon as possible, then, other schools or companies will soon overtake me.
So, I not only not relaxed, but more time to study the research step, and even this delayed the time of my thesis. At that time, I work seven days a week, working 16 hours a day. These efforts paid off, they make my speech recognition system to go further, the recognition rate from 80% to 96%. at my graduation , the system speech recognition system for many years reelected U.S. championship competitions. If I was in the 80% level stalled, casually to school, then later issued by Business Week's will certainly taken away.
So, when ...
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